ENTIRE POPULATION OF IRISH MUSICIANS RETURN TO THEIR SCHOOL TEACHING JOBS

This Monday will see the entire population of traditional Irish musicians return to their jobs as Primary and Secondary School teachers.

The 1st of September is traditionally marked as the end of summer and the beginning of the new school year, a date that is feared by Irish musicians who dread having to come back to reality.

This year will be particularly hard following a hugely successful summer which included highlights such as going mental at the Willie Clancy Week, braving the camping conditions in Drumshanbo and subverting the Fleadh culture in Sligo by arriving on the last Sunday and staying until Wednesday.

One musician told us: "I don't want to go back. You get into a rhythm and then all of a sudden the holidays are over. It's not fair. Sure the kids don't want to go back either so surely there can be some sort of compromise?"

It is a known fact that Irish musicians are attracted to teaching due to the freedom it gives them to pursue a life of music and not only that but the timing of the holidays during summer also seems to be a factor. Many of the music festival fall during this period allowing musicians the opportunity to let off steam built up trying to cope with teaching little shits during the school year.

"I'm not gonna take any crap this year! If one of these kids gets out of line I'll give them a whack with my accordion and say, 'Do you know who I am? DO YOU KNOW WHO I AM?"