COUNCILS INTRODUCE INSTRUMENT BANKS FOR CRAP INSTRUMENTS

County Councils all over Ireland have voted in favour to installing Instrument Banks in designated villages and towns in the hope of ridding the country of crap instruments.

Much like bottle and food banks where people can dispose of useless waste, these Instrument Banks will allow people to do the very same by allowing people to get rid dispose of their useless, waste of an instrument.

The decision came after it was brought to the councillors attention that Ireland is suffering from an increase in instruments such as the spoons, piano accordion, etc.

"We knew we had to address the problem after hearing all the stories of sessions being ruined by these awful, awful instruments. These banks will hopefully encourage people to dispose of these instruments and up a real one."

"Our new campaign will make sure people use these instrument banks to get rid of their wastes of money and time. The banks will be emptied every night to ensure no-one tries to salvage the waste and start another Cult Ass branch."

The banks will be green in colour and lists the instruments accepted for disposal as: Bodhrans, Piano Accordions, Whistles, Spoons & any other shite instruments. Councillors have said the new banks will encourage musicians to clean up the traditional scene in their area

However they have warned that if the banks do not work, then they may take the ultimate step and bring in Musicians Banks to deal with the musicians themselves if the instruments are not blame.