'THE DRONE NEWS INC.' ACQUIRES 'THE MILTOWN JOURNAL'

The former spearhead newspaper for traditional Irish music, 'The Miltown Journal', has been bought by 'The Drone News Inc.' for a fee of just under the price of a pint.

The acquisition comes after months of uncertainty for 'The Miltown Journal', with plummeting share prices throwing the future of the newspaper into doubt. 100 people currently work for the newspaper all over the country however they will now fall under the remit of 'The Drone News Inc.'.

Tansey von Frankiegavin: "This is a great step for our company. After moving into our swanky new offices we've strengthened our grip on traditional music media with this purchase. This is a clear indication of our ambition."

'The Miltown Journal' had survived a tumultuous few years but the final nail in the coffin was when two cartoonists were taken hostage in Gurteen, Sligo after publishing images of the Prophet Tansey. Sources say the purchase was made over a few pints between the two editors, one of whom was unhappy with the sale.

"It was only a matter of time before an offer came along but I didn't expect it in this way. I mean the price of a pint? It was more like the price of a pint of Beamish, that's like 3.50. I wanted the price of a Carlsberg, that's at least 7.50 if you're in Temple Bar..."

'The Drone' is currently identifying other major targets in the publishing world.