PEOPLE ON SANTA'S NAUGHTY LIST TO GET BAG OF HARMONICAS INSTEAD OF COAL
Father Christmas usually hands out bags of the natural energy source as a sign of his displeasure with a person's conduct over the previous year. However he has found that recently, coal does not seem to get the message across and has looked for a stronger tactic.
This led to his decision to deliver bags of harmonicas in their place, knowing that the infamous reed instrument is likely to make anyone want to change their ways.
"I always thought that coal wasn't the best way to show my displeasure as people could always just burn the coal and keep warm during the winter. I thought long and hard to find some other way and I think I've found it!"
"Harmonicas! It hit me the other day. Literally. I was at a session and someone flung one across the bar and struck me on the back of the head. Just when I thought harmonicas couldn't make me any more angry with their sound!"
The announcement was greeted with groans from fellow musicians, adding that if they do receive them this year then they'll treat them the exact same way they do the coal and burn them to keep warm. But Santa is unmoved:
"Ho ho ho. Those pesky musicians. I've had quite a few on my naughty list over the years and even more this year! The members of Kíla and some others can expect to find a nice big bag of reed instruments under their tree on Christmas morning!"