PLANE FORCED TO TURN BACK DUE TO LILTING PASSENGER

A flight from Dublin to London was forced to turn back shortly after take off due to the presence of a really bad lilting passenger.

The incident occurred on a Ryanair flight yesterday evening as passengers settled into their seats for the one hour flight, only to be disturbed by the polluting sound of a lilter on board. Flight attendants and passengers alike tried desperately to block out the sound but to no avail.

The captain took matters into his own hands and with only 10 minutes of flight time gone he decided to turn back to Dublin airport knowing that the entire crew and passengers would not be able to stand the sound for the entire flight.

"As a pilot you're trained to react to certain situations but most of the time you have to rely on instinct. This was absolutely the case here as I knew immediately that no-one could standa whole hour of that incessent noise."

"I knew I had to turn back for the sake of everybody's sanity. Ryanair has a bad reputation already without poisoning our passengers ears! I for one am glad to be back on the ground minus that lilter."

The lilter is thought to be from the West of Ireland and was on his way to London to spend a few days ruining sessions in the English capital. It is also thought that this was the man's first time flying.

Flight attendants were forced to restrain the man to his seat as he continually refused to stop lilting, causing other passengers to become edgy and nervous. However passengers soon calmed down after the man was removed from the flight by Gardaí upon arriving back at Dublin airport.

Passenger: "Nobody should have to put up with the likes of that. I don't know how we could have lasted much longer. It's as if he had no control over his own bodily functions. It just kept flowing out of him! He stank the place out!"