FOREIGN MUSICIANS FLOWN INTO IRELAND TO FILL PUBS WITH MUSIC

A large number of foreign musicians were flown into Ireland last night to fill with music the pubs left empty by traditional Irish musicians who are in lockdown.

The chartered flight, organised by publicans across Ireland, landed in Dublin aiport last night with over 200 musicians from Eastern Europe. It was reported that there was no social distancing on the flight whatsoever.

An air hostess with the airline told The Drone that the musicians even took out their instruments on board the plane and began having sessions in the aisles.

“Being on board a plane with musicians is bad enough, but when they’re these assholes that think it’s cool to have a session on the plane it’s even worse. Been there done that guys.”

“I can’t understand why these guys are being flown over. There are plenty of musicians in Ireland who’d be willing to flout the lockdown for a session.”

It ws also reported that no screening was carried out as the musicians left the plane, with many complaining of headaches and severe dehydration, however it is thought they were simply hungover, a common state for traditional musicians.

It is thought that publicans were worried about the effect that the Corona virus restrictions will have on their businesses. The lack of music being played was also a worry, with publicans going on record to say that they actually rely on music to get punters in.

VFI spokesperson: “Publicans took this drastic action to try and ease the impact that the Corona virus will have on their business. It is known all over Ireland that music get people in drinking, so they are going to reopen pubs with these foreign musicians to try and get people out of their houses and into the pub. Just follow the WHO guidelines., ‘STAY INSIDE…THE PUB!”.

However, musicians have pointed out that there are plenty of musicians in Ireland that rely on the income provided by pub gigs, and that they are simply being undercut by the publicans who are reported to be paying the foreign musicians very little.

One musician told The Drone: “I believe it is a ploy by the publicans to pay less for music really. We get paid pittance as it is for turning up and keeping sessions going in the face of loud gatherings.”