GRADAM CEOIL MINI COOPER VANDALISED BY MUSICIANS SICK OF THE AWARDS

The Mini Cooper used seen at during the opening of the TG4 Gradam Ceoil Awards has been found completely trashed down a laneway, with many people pointing fingers at musicians sick of the awards ceremony.

The car was found early Monday morning on a country lane on the outskirts of Cork City. TG4 officials have come out and criticised the attack which was thought to have been carried out by self-respecting musicians who have grown tired of the back-patting nature of the awards.

Locals reported seeing the car driving at speed through the city centre with Tony MacMahon and Noel Hill In Knocknagree' heard blasting through the speakers. TG4 officials called it a travesty:

"That car was simply doing a job. Picking up musicians who couldn't be arsed driving to Cork themselves. It had no affiliation with traditional music and didn't endorse any view point or held any opinions."

"This car was completely void of any wrong doing and this is how it is treated. I feel sorry for the musicians who carried out this attack. They're probably just jealous that they didn't get an award. Sure that's what the music boils down to these days...I think..."

The white coloured Mini Cooper was seen during an opening montage for the awards, inexplicably driving on its own like Herbie, and picking up musician after musician and dropping them to the awards literally seconds before the show went live on television.

It is thought the joyriding musicians are sick of the structure of the awards, calling out the awards panel for being insular and judges being able to nominate their own replacement after a few years.

TG4 told The Drone that the car will be retired, with its body made into tin whistles for poor school children and its engine broken down into replacement parts for uilleann pipes.