GRETA THUNBERG PROTESTS AGAINST TUNES WITH CLIMATE REFERENCES IN THE NAME
World renowned environmental activist Greta Thunberg, has stunned the Irish music world by targetting traditional Irish tunes with climate references in their title.
The 15 year old turned up at a local session last night, sat on the floor in the middle of the musicians and unveiled a placard saying, ‘NO TO TUNES WITH RAIN, SNOW, SUNNY, ETC.’, and announced that she would not be leaving until the musicians stopped playing.
The Sweden native came to the fore of world news following high profile protests targetting political leaders in order to draw their attention to the world’s dramatically changing climate.
Thunberg said that, “Traditional Irish tunes with climate references trivialise the movement for positive climate action. It is imperitive that all traditional musicians stop playing them immediately!”
“If those tunes stop being played, maybe then people will take notice! I came to this session to make a point and I’m not leaving until these musicians stop! I have a sleeping bag and rations should I need to stay for an extended period of time!”
The local musicians reacted angrily, directing their ire at the 15 year old, informing The Drone that she simply barged into the session, set herself up on the floor and started chanting, “LESS PLAYING, MORE PRAYING! LESS PLAYING, MORE PRAYING!”.
Thunberg: “Tunes like The Sunny Banks, The Rainy Day, The Wind That Shakes the Barley, Apples in Winter, and the like, they trivialise our movement! These need to be stopped! Easter Snow! If we don’t save our climate, we really will have Easter snow!”
Musicians all over the country have come out in support of the session members, saying that Thunberg should spend more time practising her tin whistle instead of harassing innocent traditional musicians.
“If she had a note in her head then maybe I might hear her out”, one musician said, “but I don’t see her playing anything. How does she know the tunes anyway? Most people who don’t play say they all sound the same!”
The stand-off between Thunberg and the musicians continues, with reports coming from the pub saying that the session is currently on its 20thround of ‘The Tempest’ in an attempt to send the 15 year old mad.